By Peggy Gisler and Marge Eberts 

If your children are moving from middle school to high school next fall, it is going to be a major turning point for them. They may be switching to a much bigger school with a lot of new students, facing increased academic expectations, handling peer pressure, choosing the right extracurricular activities, and managing increased responsibilities. And if this is not enough, they now must figure out dating, the appropriate clothing to wear, learning how to drive, and definitely part of this list is handling their online presence.

All of these new stresses can be reduced. One of the simplest ways is by having your children talk to high schoolers who have recently made the move from middle school. They should ask them what they did to make the transition easy for themselves as well as ask them what they should avoid doing. There are also helpful books that detail how to handle this transition. One is Sleeping Freshman Never Lie by David Luber. 

One of the best things that middle schoolers can do to make this transition smoother is to become involved in extracurricular activities in high school, especially if they are moving to a much bigger school. Activities can give them a niche where they find students with similar interests as well as make new friends. 

One caution: it is important that they don’t go overboard and involve themselves in too many activities. Some activities like sports and musical groups require so much time that it is probably a good idea to just concentrate on one activity or possibly two. Another thing that incoming freshmen need to be aware of is that many activities start before the first day of school. And if they wish to participate in them, they will need to be involved in them early on. A call to the school early in the summer will give them this information.

Schools are aware that the transition to high school is a big move. For this reason, many will schedule an orientation session either sometime later this school year or before the new year begins. This will give the students a good picture of the physical plant so they will have an idea of where classrooms, lockers, the library, school offices, and gym are located — making a more comfortable first day at the new school. 

Orientation meetings are also likely to have discussions of classes freshmen can or must take as well as some basic rules regarding behavior, absences, and disciplinary practices. Attending orientation meetings is a must as it is a helpful preview of what to expect as a freshman. And if a meeting is offered for parents, they will find it extremely wise to attend to get a bird’s eye view of what their children’s high school offers to and expects of their students.

While classes a freshman will take are typically chosen with the help of a counselor, it is wise for both students and their parents to have a discussion of possibilities before the meeting with a counselor. One thing that needs to be done is to find out what courses are required for admission to colleges they might attend. Then a four-year plan of courses can be sketched out to meet these requirements. The same holds true for those students who may wish to attend a technical or professional school.

Parents, here is something you might not have considered: How ready academically are your children to handle the more difficult content load they will face in high school? If children have struggled academically, parents will need to get in place the appropriate aids. And you might consider having struggling children attend a summer school or learning center program.

Over the summer, parents and children need to have meaningful discussions and come to mutually satisfactory agreements on how a variety of things will be handled to avoid problems during freshman year. This includes such things as transportation to and from school, the choice of appropriate internet websites/socials and what will be posted on them, the handling of homework, dating rules, and bedtimes. And parents, be sure to tell your children how excited you are about the new adventures in store for them! 

Peggy Gisler and Marge Eberts are experienced teachers who have taught at every level from kindergarten through college. Reach the co-authors of the Dear Teacher column by emailing [email protected] or visiting dearteacher.com. ©Compass Syndicate Corporation 2025.